Wednesday, May 9, 2012

And so, it's down to this...

Spirit bees watch over those who have gone to their final rest. Beautiful, no-threatening, never landing or resting. Are they watching over my Mom. This saying on one of the graves touched my heart, wringing the tears out of it. When will I stop missing her? And now, I have not heard from David for maybe about a month. My heart is breaking and I crave hearing my brother's voice so much. Why can't I let it go to have the Lord handle it? 

And...this Sunday is Mother's Day. I feel so wrung out with the sadness and tears. 

Well, today the $50 VISA Debit card came from ATT. It's for renewing my license - the first step toward my giving myself some relief from constantly being here in LA, even if it means just getting away for a day. I don't know what the future holds, whether I'm to stay in LA or move someplace else - like a smaller town, where I pay less rent and don't have to work. I don't want to work, but would love to concentrate on my writing, photography, and resting by traveling where I can take photos. Is this what God has in store for me or is that my thinking? 

Yes, and so it's down to life is up to you Lord. 

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